The gym sucks

As you all may know I work at the gym. I love it, for the most part. The people are awesome, the shifts go by quickly, and I can get my clean on...essentially perfecting my wife skills. That I'll likely never need. Anyways! So I seriously spend the majority of my time at the gym lately. My roommate and I just started this new workout contest because we needed serious motivation. I figure, in light of the situation, I should do another gym post. So, 
Things you should know about me (and you) at the gym

1. I am not a runner. I hate running. I do 4-3 intervals so that I can possibly get a slight cardio workout but still be lazy. So the chances of me creeping on your settings to see how I stack up are pretty good. But don't worry, I'll be gone before my half hour is even up because I'll be BEYOND BORED.
2. I don't want to be at the gym. If I am at the gym, I'm probably getting paid. If that is not the case, then I assure you that I either saw a picture and thought "that girl could use a Jillian Michaels DVD" before I realized it was me, or have something TERRIFYING awaiting me at home. Like homework or my ginger roommate.
3. If I get to the gym and realize I forgot something essential, like headphones or a hairbrush or something that might not actually be that essential, then I guarantee I will just leave and not even care that I drove all the way there and already paid for parking and all those people AND my co-workers just saw me walk in and then right back out.
4. I am not one of those girls who fears that I might get judged at the gym. You know why? I've seen guys get pinned under bars, girls fall off of ellipticals, I've listened to you struggle to lift an insane amount of weight because you were too intimidated to change the weights. and I don't really care about your problems. So if you are worried about what I'm doing or whatever, then you need to re-evaluate. 
5. I hate girls who actually get ready to go to the gym. I strategically plan my gym looks to better motivate myself. Like, last week I wore all black so I could keep telling myself I was at ninja training. No lie. Why the hell would I like...do my hair so that I can go get it all sweaty and take a shower? No. 
6. For whatever reason, I'm always checking those stupid boards on Pinterest health and fitness.. like I could have just been getting fit instead of reading about it, but let's be honest... I consider this blog a finger workout. So in my logic, looking at skinny bitches will make me a skinny bitch.
7. On that note..all those inspirational quotes that say things like "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels"...um, yeah, pretty much most things taste better. I don't like the taste of humans, especially with no meat on 'em. or, this one is my fav: "You are not a dog, don't reward yourself with food." UM I WISH I WAS A DOG, they don't have to work, they are awesome, they are loyal and super cool, and if the one thing I can have in common is that we are both rewarded with food well then bring on the biscuits. 

Seriously, do you guys want to go do like an hour and a half of ab workouts? Cause I heard that McDonald's sells a dozen chocolate chip cookies for 3 dollars, and I'm trying to work them off before I eat them all.... I'll meet you there.

Reasons guys freak me out.

Disclaimer: I'm totally generalizing here. Not all guys do these things, but they still freak me out.

1. They think it's okay to wear pajama pants in public. Uh, never.
2. They speak in weird languages. Like they use words from COD and only speak when quoting Workaholics. Okay, fine, I love workaholics though.
3. They somehow do WHATEVER THEY WANT and still seem to accomplish things. Like I feel like I am multitasking 100000% of the time and still always have something to do and they just like sleep and play video games and like....scheme and shit. What?
4. The have two smells: edible, and dirty. Like it's either "that guy smells absolutely delicious" or "oh wow, he ACTUALLY smells like BO and dirt mixed together."
5. They either never tell you anything, or they tell you everything. It's not like a sometimes thing. It's on a person-to-person basis. 
6. They think that I'm grateful when they cook and then leave.  Like, I love food. But I think I actually hate dishes more, honestly. I'd rather starve. Why do you think I didn't just cook it myself?
7. They are just genetically bigger than me. I'm instinctively intimidated by masses that are larger than me. It's science.
8. Some of them are MIND-BLOWINGLY unintelligent. Girls are too, but I'm more likely to tell a guy I think he's a dumbass because it's hard being a girl and shit happens.
9. They will never understand girls. And that's a fact, Jack. But it still freaks me out. You want me to commit my life and womb to someone who just doesn't get me as a human? Think again, bro. 
10. I could actually keep going with this list. And you could probably add to it, too.

Just think about THAT. Sweet dreams.

I like to make lists.

  Like I've said before, I love instilling faith and happiness in others. I like to think I'm a good listener and that I help just enough. I try not to be overbearing or controlling, I simply try to do what I am asked when it comes to friendly advice or being there. In turn, I ask for help or advice or just a good listener if I need it.
  That being said, I am a pretty independent person. I have learned that if I want something done, I should do it myself. So if I need to be cheered up, I'll usually take a day to sit and be sad. and eat. and sleep. and watch movies. And after that, I look at pretty things. I make a mental list of things that I like about me. If I can't think of ANYTHING(which happens sometimes), I make a list of things I can do to create something I like about myself. My thought process is usually like: "go to the gym, clean my apartment, take a shower, do my hair, do my nails, fill an online shopping cart with clothes I can't buy. But look, I'm thrifty and have really good taste. Oh, I have good taste. I like that about me." As you can see, it works most of the time. But sometimes it doesn't and in that case I just take another day to eat and be sad.
  [I have a board on Pinterest (the stupidest and awesomest site on the internet all at the same time) of quotes that are just about yourself. I obviously have other ones that are about love and friends and Jesus and whatnot, but sometimes to make yourself happy it has to be about you. So here is a link in case you need it, because I heart you and I'm a good sharer.Click here for your instant inspiration]
  I suck at life, really. But there's no guide to follow and even if there was, chances are I'd just wing it. So do what ya gotta do, kids, cause life is an uphill climb. Sometimes ya just gotta roll down the hill, laugh it off, and start over. Good luck!

My little brother hates Sixlets.

I am super lazy. So I'm going back to lists today.

Things college students do on break:

1. Nothing- Seriously, ask almost every college student ever what they're most looking forward to doing over break, and this will be the answer. I can't tell you how many times I said this the last 2 weeks of the semester.
2. Sleep- not that we don't do that pretty much whenever we want anyways.
3. Play video games- I don't. but pretty much everyone does.
4. Plan to see High school friends- most probably don't see as many as they think they will.
5. Eat-Our parents buy food all the time, and we so don't. And if you do end up seeing those friends, you're either eating or drinking with them, or both,
6. PARTY!- like, twice over the whole month. maybe. unless you're my friends... oops.

Things I did over break:

1. Nothing. I slept a ton. and ate a ton. and sat on my ass a ton.
2. Hung out with my brother. and parents. Seriously, like every day. I've played more board games since the 1st than in all of 2012. I'm pretty much all caught up on all the Disney Channel series'.
3. Did I mention eat?
4. FINALLY SAW MY BESTIE. Apparently helping people in need sounded better than hanging out at home waiting for me to come home on weekends... whatever.
5. Hung out. After my first year of college I realized who the people back home who really cared about me were, so I make sure to make time for them. and we always have too much fun. To all of you, thanks. I'd list all the fun we had, but to be honest I promised not to talk about most of it anymore. :)

Coming home is always worth it, but I love my school and my friends. And I have goals to achieve, so my next blog will be from my comfy couch in my tiny annoying apartment, so see ya then.

PS, Sixlets are good and my brother is nuts.