You can't be an expert at everything

Something I like to do is set vague goals for myself every school year. This way, I get to go on binges of bettering myself, but if I don't necessarily do anything HUGE, I still gain something. For example, freshman year I worked on time management and sophomore year I got more involved.

This year, I'm working on finding my expertise. I love sports, I love social media, and I love finding people who share my passions. It's a journey, but I know there's a way to combine those things and make myself marketable for my dream career.

One thing that I find myself learning along the way is that I want to do everything myself. That way, I know that it's getting done and that it will be the way I want it. I've never thought of myself as a control freak, but the reality is, I am a HUGE control freak. I want all of the information, I want it in advance, and I want everyone to work with me on it. And honestly, I'm okay with it as long as I know that I'm the person who can do the BEST job.

The hardest lesson I've learned, though, is that I'm not always that person. You can't be an expert on everything, and why would you want to? No one likes a know-it-all. You can, however, take a step back. Let everyone weigh in! You can bounce ideas around, combine them to build something great, and if someone comes up with a solid plan, let them take the lead. Being a part of a team can be just as great of an experience as taking the lead, and you get the chance to learn from someone else's skill set.

I try (and fail a lot!) to take everything day by day and not be so hard on myself. Like I said, it's a journey, but this is what college years are for. Have fun and learn! You'll never regret it.

xox, Alexa

I want to punch someone in the face

I am really frustrated today. Don't my professors realize that I don't have time to do guesswork? I cannot sit here and research what you're looking for from this assignment. How hard is it to just give us a sample and a rubric? Not a template, that means nothing to me. UGH.

To my professors:

No, I can't spend weekends working on your assignments. I work 3/4 weekends a month and I travel because I'm in college, this is when it's possible, and the only person who can keep me sane is 3 hours away. So no, I don't have time on the weekends to work on things other than my actual job.

You make me mad at you, you make me mad at education, and you make me mad at myself. This is a great way to break down your students' confidence levels! If that's the goal, I hope you know you've achieved it.

I have been doing so well this semester staying on top of things, and in one badly set-up assignment, you have crushed all pride I had in myself.

SO THANK YOU. I'll take this as your resignation of credibility as a decent professor. or person.

Sincerely, Alexa

Case of the Mondays?

I've been really blessed lately to get so many amazing opportunities and be able to have so many great people in my life. I have a new job, I got to keep my old job, I have a new committee position, I'm in some really great classes, and of course I have my boyfriend, friends, and family to help me fill my empty spots. I feel so overwhelmed with excitement and luck that these opportunities and people have found me and that I'm getting all these great parts of a college experience.
But.
I feel SO OVERWHELMED. I work seven days a week most weeks and when I'm not working I'm still thinking about it and planning for it and squeezing in homework because without a degree it will all be for nothing. To be fair, I can't help but do more than I'm asked sometimes. If I have an interest, it becomes a priority, but I usually notice that it pays off.
It's a struggle sometimes because I can't even seem to relax with the things that I love, like my family or football games or a drive. They're all just starting to be things that take up precious time. People expect me to make time and be social and they get hurt when they're not a priority.
Being in a long distance relationship has as many stress factors as it does rewards. When was the last time I actually called him? What did we talk about? Did I tell him about that thing that my mom said? Did I invite him to that thing that I know we can't make anyways? Does he think I'm certifiably insane yet? I seriously never know.

I'm trying to focus on the positives and make sure to remember my goals, and I'm feeling pretty confident in myself lately simply because of the fact that I have goals.
I have trouble asking for help and I don't like when people let others control their lives. But I've been so fortunate to have met someone who helps me structure mine and helps me set and achieve my goals even when he doesn't know it.

I know it's cliche, but I really do learn new things every day. I struggle but I see the payoff.

It's going to be worth it. :)

Things my little brothers should know

Most people don't know this, but being a big sister is a full time job. It's like being a part time mom, if you ask me. I worry about my brothers constantly. I only have little brothers, and thank the Lord cause I would not have been nice to a sister. Last week I texted the older boys and said that I just wanted them to know that I love them and I'm proud of them.
In predictable Luke fashion, I got no reply. Background story: Luke says he hates me. He'll tell anyone without even hesitating. Sometimes I believe him. He also had just had a....run in with the law at an Iowa game and I was most disappointed that he was at a Hawkeye game. Then again he thought I went to Illinois State for like 5 months.
Zack actually texted me back, as he usually does. His reply? "For what?" and I had to laugh, because sometimes I ask that too. Kid gets it.
Dan is nine and my bestie for life so I just sent him a telepathic message. Never heard back.

In reality though, they're my favorite things about me and everyone knows it. So my blog is a list of things little brothers should know. Or really, things that all younger siblings should know.

1. You came into our lives without our consent and we're still bitter about it. But we're also glad that Mom and Dad knew better than we did.

2. At one point, we tried to trade you for someone else's cooler, cuter sibling. We cut it off before the deal was final, though, so you're welcome. 

3. We are siblings whether you like it or not. You can block me on Facebook and pretend you don't know me in public, but we have the same last name. People figure it out.

4. I don't care what anyone says, we share a gene pool and you are damn good looking. Haters gonna hate.

5. We will always take your side. Even if we know you're wrong. Unless you're fighting each other, then I take the little one's side cause we're small and it's not fair. 

6. We are older and smarter and that means that we are always right. Even when we're wrong. We won't back down, so drop it.

7. You are our first and our last best friends. Even if we never wanted to see/hear/smell you sometimes. (In the case of my brothers, you were there for me more than you knew. Z&L-through our parents' divorce, you were the only ones who were my equals. When I was young and scared or lonely, you squeezed me in your bed and then would never admit who peed on me. When everyone else was too busy, you weren't. D- you taught me to laugh and to play and how to be who I wanted to be. I don't think you three will ever understand how much I remember or how much it means to me now.)

8. We still remember every time we seriously injured you, and sometimes we're sorry. Other times we use the memories as fighting fuel in wrestling matches.

9. No one can make us mad like you can. But no one can make us as proud as you can. We know who you are deep down. We've seen you at your weakest. Hell, we've made you cry. We also saw you come back from it and we watched you grow up and learn and become real people. 

10. We love you. Even if you call us names, we love you. Even if you cheer for the wrong team, we love you. Even if you try to wrestle us, we love you. Even if you make bad choices, we love you. Even if we hate you, we love you. ESPECIALLY when you think we don't, we love you.

This just turned into Blogday Tuesday, but it's worth it. 

Heroes come in all forms.

I have mixed feelings about Taylor Swift

There. I said it.

There's no denying that she has talent as a songwriter.
Her songs are great... If anyone else sang them.
Her love life is embarrassing, and the fact that tons of little girls adore her grosses me out.
She just runs around getting her naive little heart broken by normal guys.
Actually, I don't even know if she's naive at this point or just stupid.

I feel really mean right now. (I hope someone catches that pun.)
But I just want her to grow up a little.
Not like drastically, she doesn't need to fast forward to 40.
But stop dating like a 15-year-old.
and dating 15-year-olds.


But I listened to like 3 of her songs today.
The fact of the matter is that I just wrote a whole blog about Taylor Swift.
That's probably just as sad.

Hello Old Sport ;)

I have been wanting to blog again for like the last 3 Mondays, but I have had this serious problem.

For the first time in my 20 years of life, I don't have anything to say.

I write this blog to rant, or complain, or tell people how I think I'm living my life. But I'm happy and I'm alive. So what do I even write about now?

Honestly, today I got up at 5:30 after sleeping for 4 hours with no A/C and went to work without showering. Then I drove through Dunkin' Donuts and had a chocolate frosted donut in the middle of a gym while people exercised. After working a double shift(which is still only 8 hours), I came home, thankfully to a cold apartment. I ate and watched Netflix for a few hours, called the carpet cleaners, googled some stuff, and got up again. I cooked meat for spaghetti but then ended up throwing ranch seasoning and Lawry's on it and putting it on a bun. I proceeded to drink 3 Capri Suns and eat Colleen's kettle corn. I threw a handful of Mini Reese's into a glass, yes a glass, of ice cream, and watched the Home Run Derby alone. 

I'm two months into a super great long distance relationship that feels like it's already been a short eternity. I have a good job, I'm moving into a new apartment soon, I got a great internship, I watch Friends on Nick at Nite almost every day...

The moral of this ridiculous story is that I'm living my life and my main concern is that at one or more points in writing this blog I have been guilty of thinking I know better than someone else how to live their life. And that's not cool. I would hate for someone to think they know better than me how to live mine. And I'll probably be guilty of it plenty in the future, but at least I'm starting to realize it. 

Does this mean I'm growing up?

Shit babies do that I wish I could get away with

I don't know where this is coming from, but just roll with it.

So babies get to sleep anywhere and whenever they want and I just wish I could still do that. First of all, it's frowned upon unless you're a hobo, and even though I look like one 90% of the time, I'm actually not. Also, I wish I could just fall asleep anywhere... I can never get comfortable. And no matter how many times I ask, no one will hold me. weird.

Also, babies get to go around wearing no pants and people are like "how cute is he/she?!" and they talk about their adorable fat legs and I'm like... I'd like to wear no pants and have y'all think my fat legs are adorable... would that be alright? Also diapers= no need to make 50 bathroom breaks after a Kum & Go drink deal. When will that be socially acceptable?

Speaking of socially acceptable, babies get to be carried everywhere. Also, they can just crawl around in grocery stores and really right through life. and people just go with it. And like, I'm pretty lazy too.. but I get hardcore judged if I like crawl across the aisle in a lecture hall to grab my pencil off the floor.

Lastly, I really wish I could go back to taking baths in sinks. They appear to be way more fun, you always have company, and there are bubbles and toys and there are sinks everywhere... never need to make a special trip home just to bathe. It would be ideal.

Babies got it good, yo.

GROUP BLOG!

Today I'm recruiting my roommate and her boyfriend to help me compile a list for this lovely piece of my heart... Cause it's Monday. and it's blog day. And I'm so happy today!

SO, on that note, We present to you:

Things we wish weren't real

1. Summer Classes
Like seriously, why can't we just enjoy summer without worrying about Marrketing Principles? Ew. That doesn't sound Summery.

2. Poison Ivy
"Because I have it along my body and it itches."- Galyon

3. Back hair
"Because it's weird." -Colleen

4. Mosquitos
They bite, they're weird, they spread diseases. And they look super creepy up close. 

5. Calories
We like food. All kinds of food. Mostly sugary food. And there's a lot of calories in it. 

6. Coke Zero
Why couldn't we just make Diet Coke taste more like regular Coke in the first place? That would have made sense...

7. Private Twitter Accounts
Like, either tweet appropriate things, stop caring, or get off of Twitter... I LIKE TO RETWEET.


I could go on and on... but it's 11:30 and the club is jumpin, jumpin. Just a little Destiny's Child reference... ;) Happy Monday! 

xox

Furry friends!

I want a puppy REALLY bad. Like, look at this guy.

He's like "Take me home, we'll be cute together!"

But that's ridiculous because I can't play with, walk, or train a puppy. I don't have time or patience.
I just want people to let me play with their puppies!
But I want you all to stop naming your dogs really trendy names. Like... I don't want to be specific here and offend anyone... But you could stop naming your dogs names that start with a B and are actually a make of car and might have been the name of a child on Teen Mom. Just a thought.
Also you all could stop paying ridiculous amounts of money for weird mutt mixes that aren't really cute. Rescue a dog. It's really nice and they want you back. Like, if you rescue it I don't even care if you name it something stupid. But if you get a rescue you're probably smarter than that.

Anyways, my favorite animal right now is a goat. I point them out everywhere. I watch videos of them. I look at memes of them. I laugh out loud when I see them.My cousin Michael had a goat once, and I forgot until my Aunt Lisa told me about it in Jamaica. Because there are goats EVERYWHERE in Jamaica. I don't remember it very well but it was funny for a while. But this video of goats gets me every time...

So, I like to consider myself someone you might come to for a smile. and If you really want to smile, you should look up goat stuff. And if you don't come across this yourself or somehow haven't discovered this gem or are really excited about this post and waiting for this link... here's a video of a goat featured in a T-Swift song. Enjoy. ;)

An Ingenius Plan

In honor of finals week here at the glorious campus of Iowa State, I'd like to help you all out. Gather 'round!

How to get through a stressful time, Alexa style.

1. EAT. Obviously you need vitamins and stuff. But we don't want our bodies to go into starvation mode or anything, so let's fatten up just in case. Eat an entire bag of Reese's minis, chips and guac, leftover Applebee's, a strawberry every time you open the fridge, a surprise cupcake(I'm really liking this whole being someone's girlfriend thing... especially when there are cupcakes involved.) Like, have one of everything.

2. CHECK YOUR FACEBOOK AND TWITTER CONSTANTLY. You never know when something new will come up. You know you can't wait to creep on pictures of your cousin's wife's brother's roommate's baby. Ellen DeGeneres might tweet the funniest thing you've seen all week, and you need to be on top of that. Don't blink. 

3. MAKE SURE EVERYONE AROUND YOU BELIEVES YOU'RE BEING PRODUCTIVE. Don't let them see your computer screen, EVER, because then they'll get really mad when you keep complaining about how much work you have to get done. And then when they complain to you, you can be like, "I haven't moved from this spot all day, studying/work/whatever is consuming all of my time."

4. RED BULL. The less time you sleep, the more time you have to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING productive! Don't ever start doing real work until around 11 pm. Ruins all the fun. Right about when you start to think about getting something done, grab a Red Bull. People will think you're exhausted from work, but really everyone should try all the new flavors. I prefer cranberry.

5. CRY. Definitely do that, and complain a lot about how this is so unfair, why do people even do this? School is so stupid, I wish I could be a professional cupcake eater, wahhhh....

6. CRAM AS MUCH PRODUCTIVITY INTO THE LAST MINUTE AS POSSIBLE. Oh, it's 10 pm and you have an 8 am final/deadline/event? Time to start that work now. Better hop to it! But make sure your facebook/twitter/e-mail/pinterest/tumblr/phone/snapchat are open constantly so you can have a terrible excuse to take a break!

Take it easy, and pray for an epic curve. XO, Alexa

If you want to be happy, just try it.

Last night I had to tell my roommate that I take it all back.
All the crazy judgemental things I ever said about her relationships or decisions about guys.

I didn't get it. We had different priorities and I wasn't very good at respecting that.
I still stand by some of the things I said about not settling, but here it goes.

I'm trying this new thing. It's called being happy. 

I've always spoken my mind here. And I've always said that I want to just do what's best for me and makes me happy. So I'm doing it.

When I wrote all those blogs about being happy and not needing someone else and being independent and awesome(which was true at the time and is actually possible) I was in really complicated and lost places in my life.

I feel so supported right now by my family, friends, coworkers, everyone. I'm realizing that I can actually do it alone. But it might be easier with a little help. 

So like I said. I'm trying this new thing where I'm just going with it, and being happy.

I highly recommend it.

Miss me yet?

My friends think it's time to get back to my blog. I think it's worth a shot.

So, after this last week, I am exhausted, hungry, lonely, and a little desperate for something to do.
But I loved every single busy, demanding, beautiful, cardinal and gold, PR moment of it.

When I applied for VEISHEA, I was looking for anything to give me back what I thought I lost when I wasn't asked back to the cheer squad last spring. I felt like I lost all of the people I had counted on to get me through college, and I was back to the start. I had noooo idea what I was getting myself into. I am honestly so thankful that I got this opportunity. I was so nervous going into my interview that night and I was pretty positive they thought I was so weird. I kind of figured out later that weird was a recurring theme on the PR committee. I loved it.

All my non-#V friends probably HATE me. I didnt answer my phone, I was mean, I did not make time for anyone, and I even ignored a couple of them in public (on accident I swear, couldnt help it).  So guys, Im sorry and I still love you!

I got next to no sleep, but I was up all night giving fake angry glares to exec members that I couldn't have loved more. To anyone who took my angry looks and sassy remarks seriously, Im sorry. I was having a great time.

I could not have picked any better people to have spent the last week with. I dont regret a single decision. Except maybe parking in the lot I did on Friday, because Im now $160 poorer and lost a couple hours of carefully scheduled sleep recovering it. And everyone and their mom offered to drive me to go get it!

 Ive even been talking to my advisers about re-structuring my graduation goals thanks to a better understanding of what I LOVE to do. Everyone that I met was so fantastic, and I havent felt like such a part of something huge in a long time. So thank you all!

#VEISHEA love, cant wait for 2014.

I'm a failure

I'm not going to lie, I'm not motivated to write this blog lately.

I have been so busy and to be honest, I am almost always on the go.

But I promise, someday soon, inspiration will come to me. And I will keep you all updated.

I'm always writing about how I have to be selfish and do things that make me happy and until this blog is something that brightens my day instead of adds to my list of things to do, I can't justify it :(

But I'll let you know when the world is right again. Thanks for always caring what I have to say! I'm going to take next week off and have an awesome time in Jamaica with my family. Until then, my loves.

XOXOX

Epic Blog Day

SO first things first: ran into a friend of a friend this weekend and she told me she got married over the summer. She knows what's up, so I hope no one thinks I'm trying to offend her but I just want to relive this story again. 

I recognize this girl and she comes over to figure out how we know each other. She tells me her name and we realize we've met a couple times through a mutual friends. So then she's like "Oh I don't go out much anymore because I got married this summer." Then my friend grabs her hand and sure as all hell she's got a princess cut diamond on there! I just held onto her hand and open-mouth stared at it for a second, while she laughed. I finally choked out an oh-my-god while my friend was the question master: "how old are you? how long have you been together? are you pregnant?" etc...Then this girl looks at me and is like "You can't decide whether to punch me in the face or congratulate me, can you?" 

YES, GIRL, THAT IS MY EXACT PREDICAMENT. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? 

I mean, she seems intelligent. I hope it works out for her. But whoa. There's that.

Second topic, my favorite virtual reality, Twitter has influenced my weekend. I noticed that #FictionalDeathsIWillNeverGetOver was trending, and I was inspired so here is my list: 

1-- is an OBVIOUS Mufasa. That was tragic, and terrible, and then on top of it Simba thought it was his fault, poor baby.

Being brave doesn't mean you go looking for trouble.

2--is going to have to be Dumbledore. I mean, almost all of my favorite life lessons were his insightful words.

It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live

3-- Old Yeller. Even my mom cried every time we watched it.

Best dog-gone dog in the west

4-- Lennie in Of Mice and Men... I was notorious for reading ahead all through school and I so picked the wrong day to read ahead when we read that freshman year. I was SO MAD. Like, I don't even care, you don't kill your best friend you fight like hell to defend him. But then I change my mind and I don't even know. I'm obviously still really bitter. 

We could live offa the fatta the land, George!

5-- Ellie in Up. Greatest, realest love story in Disney, and they didn't even need words. Ugh, I'm tearing up just thinking about it. So much emotion right now..

Thanks for the adventure. Now go have one of your own.

I love living in made up worlds. They're continuously better than my own. But I'm obviously really bitter with some of these writers. At least they have happy endings. :) Except for Lennie... UGH.

xo, lex

 

Restoring my faith in humanity.

I try to surround myself with generally good people. People who are helpful and generous and happy people. But that's not always the case, and honestly it's hard to be that way myself sometimes. And I lose a little bit of faith in mankind every day. There's a whole list off the top if my head of things that disappoint me like: the fact that women are paid significantly less than men for equal(if not better) work, I'm not sure racism, sexism, and stereotyping will ever disappear, or the fact that people think a whole lot less of themselves than they deserve. But every once in a while, I find inspirational things that are just so freakin cool and it makes me feel a little better about the goodness in the world.

Like, these people for instance. 

The message of the whole video is amazing(and it was shared by a fantastic former teacher of mine, who is expecting a baby with her wife soon), but the part that really got me is that one man goes out of his way to ask the judgmental waitress if she believes in Jesus. In conservative Texas, he might as well have slapped her in the face. But then he goes on to explain that it is not her place to judge. And when asked about it later he just explains that he thinks silence is the problem today. "Christians" are quick to judge, but forget the "love one another" part too quickly, if you ask me.

Or these people. Who are accepting and gracious, and show the greatest side of athletics in general. 

My favorite quote from this video is "I was just raised to treat everyone the way I want to be treated." Because I know that my parents would be so proud to be this kid's parents. I hope that if given the opportunity, I would make the same call this kid did. And it just brought to mind kids from my small town high school who wouldn't have done it. But it brought to mind more who would have. Kids who were raised with the best of intentions. And the fact that this kid took this opportunity to show the world and media that his parents made him the person that he is shows so much gratitude and respect. I respect that, because I owe all that I am to the people who raised me. Not just my parents, but my whole family and all my coaches who have taught me all kinds of lessons along the way.

In the end, I guess it restored my faith in myself. And though I think I'm pretty remarkable sometimes, in reality I'm on the same playing field as everyone else. Maybe they're all seeing the same things.

xox

I miss my cheeseburger.

I'm a busy, lazy girl.
So the most awesome thing in my life, was a big, greasy, cheesy burger.
And then I got fat.

So lent rolled around and I'm like what can I give up? Something that I love but might be better off without. Social networking? Not possible, duh. VEISHEA. Pop? Yeah that doesn't work.

I got it, McDonald's. No, fast food. I gave up fast food for lent.
I'm not eating burgers or fries or even chicken caesar salads from the drive-thru.

I wish I could tell you that I know the lack of McDoubles will make me a better person but I can't tell you that. Because honestly, I miss them. I miss convenient food that is greasy and delicious and salty.

AND I GAVE UP FAST FOOD JUST IN TIME TO ONLY GET ONE SHAMROCK SHAKE.

I'm not going to give in to the devil desires of the McDynasty.
But UGH I want a burger. This isn't even fun.

Why couldn't I give up loser guys instead?

Ambitions

So this weekend I got to go home and watch my babies KILL it at the State Cheerleading Competition... That team made me who I am today, and I am so blessed to have been able to cheer with such talented athletes, both in high school and college. I have made lifetime friends and I am so grateful.

Coaches taught me so much more than skills. I learned how working hard can be fun. How the reward is so sweet. I learned that respect should be mutual, always. I learned that you have to give if you want to receive. And most of all, your family isn't even who you expected it to be. You all know already, but you can't replace people like Joey, Gail, Kay, and all the amazing coaches who have come through our program.

For those of you who see the end of an amazing opportunity such as this as that, the end, well I have news. You will do such greater things in life. 
How you take hold of opportunities can define you. Working hard and knowing you did your best will make it so worth it, regardless of someone's opinion of you. You will always know your worth.
When you see the end of the road coming, walk slow, take it in, smile as you cross the finish line. Twirl around in a circle and see where your next path leads, because someday you'll have great successes, and experience new joys that will remind you how you felt during these times. I've already had a few myself.

Don't take any part for granted. I have no regrets, and I know that I'm blessed, but in cases like this I know that I've always been given only what I have earned. Sometimes you have to grab onto an opportunity and make it what you always hoped it would be.

Remember to thank your parents for their hard work. I know it seems small, and you definitely did the hard work, but you wouldn't be anywhere without their rides to practice, their long days spent cheering on a cheerleader, and not to mention the financial aspect that being the prettiest girls in school can be. ;)

Just know that even though a panel of RANDOM STRANGERS you've never met may say they beat you by a hair, we couldn't be more proud. And at the end of the day, you guys know you won so much more than a trophy and a title. xoxox, Lex

The gym sucks

As you all may know I work at the gym. I love it, for the most part. The people are awesome, the shifts go by quickly, and I can get my clean on...essentially perfecting my wife skills. That I'll likely never need. Anyways! So I seriously spend the majority of my time at the gym lately. My roommate and I just started this new workout contest because we needed serious motivation. I figure, in light of the situation, I should do another gym post. So, 
Things you should know about me (and you) at the gym

1. I am not a runner. I hate running. I do 4-3 intervals so that I can possibly get a slight cardio workout but still be lazy. So the chances of me creeping on your settings to see how I stack up are pretty good. But don't worry, I'll be gone before my half hour is even up because I'll be BEYOND BORED.
2. I don't want to be at the gym. If I am at the gym, I'm probably getting paid. If that is not the case, then I assure you that I either saw a picture and thought "that girl could use a Jillian Michaels DVD" before I realized it was me, or have something TERRIFYING awaiting me at home. Like homework or my ginger roommate.
3. If I get to the gym and realize I forgot something essential, like headphones or a hairbrush or something that might not actually be that essential, then I guarantee I will just leave and not even care that I drove all the way there and already paid for parking and all those people AND my co-workers just saw me walk in and then right back out.
4. I am not one of those girls who fears that I might get judged at the gym. You know why? I've seen guys get pinned under bars, girls fall off of ellipticals, I've listened to you struggle to lift an insane amount of weight because you were too intimidated to change the weights. and I don't really care about your problems. So if you are worried about what I'm doing or whatever, then you need to re-evaluate. 
5. I hate girls who actually get ready to go to the gym. I strategically plan my gym looks to better motivate myself. Like, last week I wore all black so I could keep telling myself I was at ninja training. No lie. Why the hell would I like...do my hair so that I can go get it all sweaty and take a shower? No. 
6. For whatever reason, I'm always checking those stupid boards on Pinterest health and fitness.. like I could have just been getting fit instead of reading about it, but let's be honest... I consider this blog a finger workout. So in my logic, looking at skinny bitches will make me a skinny bitch.
7. On that note..all those inspirational quotes that say things like "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels"...um, yeah, pretty much most things taste better. I don't like the taste of humans, especially with no meat on 'em. or, this one is my fav: "You are not a dog, don't reward yourself with food." UM I WISH I WAS A DOG, they don't have to work, they are awesome, they are loyal and super cool, and if the one thing I can have in common is that we are both rewarded with food well then bring on the biscuits. 

Seriously, do you guys want to go do like an hour and a half of ab workouts? Cause I heard that McDonald's sells a dozen chocolate chip cookies for 3 dollars, and I'm trying to work them off before I eat them all.... I'll meet you there.

Reasons guys freak me out.

Disclaimer: I'm totally generalizing here. Not all guys do these things, but they still freak me out.

1. They think it's okay to wear pajama pants in public. Uh, never.
2. They speak in weird languages. Like they use words from COD and only speak when quoting Workaholics. Okay, fine, I love workaholics though.
3. They somehow do WHATEVER THEY WANT and still seem to accomplish things. Like I feel like I am multitasking 100000% of the time and still always have something to do and they just like sleep and play video games and like....scheme and shit. What?
4. The have two smells: edible, and dirty. Like it's either "that guy smells absolutely delicious" or "oh wow, he ACTUALLY smells like BO and dirt mixed together."
5. They either never tell you anything, or they tell you everything. It's not like a sometimes thing. It's on a person-to-person basis. 
6. They think that I'm grateful when they cook and then leave.  Like, I love food. But I think I actually hate dishes more, honestly. I'd rather starve. Why do you think I didn't just cook it myself?
7. They are just genetically bigger than me. I'm instinctively intimidated by masses that are larger than me. It's science.
8. Some of them are MIND-BLOWINGLY unintelligent. Girls are too, but I'm more likely to tell a guy I think he's a dumbass because it's hard being a girl and shit happens.
9. They will never understand girls. And that's a fact, Jack. But it still freaks me out. You want me to commit my life and womb to someone who just doesn't get me as a human? Think again, bro. 
10. I could actually keep going with this list. And you could probably add to it, too.

Just think about THAT. Sweet dreams.

I like to make lists.

  Like I've said before, I love instilling faith and happiness in others. I like to think I'm a good listener and that I help just enough. I try not to be overbearing or controlling, I simply try to do what I am asked when it comes to friendly advice or being there. In turn, I ask for help or advice or just a good listener if I need it.
  That being said, I am a pretty independent person. I have learned that if I want something done, I should do it myself. So if I need to be cheered up, I'll usually take a day to sit and be sad. and eat. and sleep. and watch movies. And after that, I look at pretty things. I make a mental list of things that I like about me. If I can't think of ANYTHING(which happens sometimes), I make a list of things I can do to create something I like about myself. My thought process is usually like: "go to the gym, clean my apartment, take a shower, do my hair, do my nails, fill an online shopping cart with clothes I can't buy. But look, I'm thrifty and have really good taste. Oh, I have good taste. I like that about me." As you can see, it works most of the time. But sometimes it doesn't and in that case I just take another day to eat and be sad.
  [I have a board on Pinterest (the stupidest and awesomest site on the internet all at the same time) of quotes that are just about yourself. I obviously have other ones that are about love and friends and Jesus and whatnot, but sometimes to make yourself happy it has to be about you. So here is a link in case you need it, because I heart you and I'm a good sharer.Click here for your instant inspiration]
  I suck at life, really. But there's no guide to follow and even if there was, chances are I'd just wing it. So do what ya gotta do, kids, cause life is an uphill climb. Sometimes ya just gotta roll down the hill, laugh it off, and start over. Good luck!

My little brother hates Sixlets.

I am super lazy. So I'm going back to lists today.

Things college students do on break:

1. Nothing- Seriously, ask almost every college student ever what they're most looking forward to doing over break, and this will be the answer. I can't tell you how many times I said this the last 2 weeks of the semester.
2. Sleep- not that we don't do that pretty much whenever we want anyways.
3. Play video games- I don't. but pretty much everyone does.
4. Plan to see High school friends- most probably don't see as many as they think they will.
5. Eat-Our parents buy food all the time, and we so don't. And if you do end up seeing those friends, you're either eating or drinking with them, or both,
6. PARTY!- like, twice over the whole month. maybe. unless you're my friends... oops.

Things I did over break:

1. Nothing. I slept a ton. and ate a ton. and sat on my ass a ton.
2. Hung out with my brother. and parents. Seriously, like every day. I've played more board games since the 1st than in all of 2012. I'm pretty much all caught up on all the Disney Channel series'.
3. Did I mention eat?
4. FINALLY SAW MY BESTIE. Apparently helping people in need sounded better than hanging out at home waiting for me to come home on weekends... whatever.
5. Hung out. After my first year of college I realized who the people back home who really cared about me were, so I make sure to make time for them. and we always have too much fun. To all of you, thanks. I'd list all the fun we had, but to be honest I promised not to talk about most of it anymore. :)

Coming home is always worth it, but I love my school and my friends. And I have goals to achieve, so my next blog will be from my comfy couch in my tiny annoying apartment, so see ya then.

PS, Sixlets are good and my brother is nuts.